Something about a winter sunset always makes me a little melancholy. I’ve been that way lately anyway, what with not writing and adjusting to a new place and a lot of little things I can’t quite put my finger on. Today I wasted hours trying to navigate options to renew my health insurance, and now the whole afternoon is already over. Damn. Why do the inane things seem to always take so long?
I think the problem is that the main entertainment in my life is looking at my to do list each day and crossing out what is done. In my own defense, this is a beautiful, color coded list on which I use glitter pens and neon highlighters and doodle around the edges. It occurs to me that maybe I don’t like list making half as much as I like coloring.
I also spent some time today online looking for volunteer opportunities. If I’m going to be unemployed and not writing, I’ve decided to get myself out of my funk by at least making someone else’s life better. It’s a good idea, but the potential assignments are pretty daunting. Most require hours of training, and most of the training is over for this year. The qualifications for one position actually said “ability to remain calm in all situations”. Seriously? Calm is good, but in all situations? The frustrated writer in me went wild inventing scenarios that did not call for calm. Sigh ….
It’s a silly, childish funk I’m in and I know it. I need to pick up my laptop, move on to chapter 3 and stop stalling. The story is in my head. I can do this. It wouldn’t hurt to do some other things too of course. Go for walk. Fill out the volunteer form. Pick up my pens and doodle. Maybe even just enjoy the sunset.